


that was the hazy cosmic jive

by rayguntomyhead



Series: soon you'll grow so take a chance [1]
Category: Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Canon Cybertronian sort-of-mech-preg i did in fact not make this up, Fluff and Crack, Gen, Transformer Sparklings, in that this happens to Jazz and Prowl specifically
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-13
Updated: 2020-07-13
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:14:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25236025
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rayguntomyhead/pseuds/rayguntomyhead
Summary: “Oh no,” Jazz said. Prowl froze. Those were never particularly positive words to hear, but in the case that they were coming from one of the most intelligent, conniving and altogether contrary mecha in the entire Autobot Command, they were particularly alarming.
Relationships: Jazz & Prowl
Series: soon you'll grow so take a chance [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1917790
Comments: 22
Kudos: 135





	that was the hazy cosmic jive

**Author's Note:**

> ... so Eugenesis is wild. And I'm not even through the _introduction_. so here, enjoy some fully canonical chest-burster alien babies.

“Oh no,” Jazz said. Prowl froze. Those were never particularly positive words to hear, but in the case that they were coming from one of the most intelligent, conniving and altogether contrary mecha in the entire Autobot Command, they were _particularly_ alarming.

“Oh frag,” Jazz said, as if in confirmation. Prowl turned back around to face him, battle protocols onlining with a hum except– 

“Oh dear,” Prowl said, and opened his arms just in time to catch the silvery grey mass of undifferentiated protoform that ejected itself from Jazz’s chest. 

How fascinating. Prowl hadn’t seen an ejection since the first joor of his onlining, what with the massively bloated population in Praxus. It was certainly not something he’d accounted for in his pre-meeting plan. Not that Jazz’s presence was ever conducive to Prowl’s ability to adhere to his pre-meeting plans. At this point they were supposed to be at Prowl's desk reviewing Jazz's latest report, not arguing over the necessity of said report next to Prowl's office door.

He stared down at the newspark, strings of churning protomatter strung between and draped over each arm. The texture of it was… disconcerting. An almost alien pliable softness, like river mud, and it didn’t just hang there it _moved._ Slowly, part by part, shifting around until it stopped resembling nothing more than a ball of exploded energon jelly and started to look like an actual mech. 

“Uh,” Jazz said. 

“Hush,” Prowl said, not looking up from the protoform. “Don’t distract them. The first few minutes of development are crucial.”

“Uh,” Jazz said again, probably just to be contrary although the tone of his vocalizer did register in Prowl’s audials as shriller and louder than it had with the previous interjection. Prowl payed him no attention. Instead he hummed gently at the protoform, watching as first one arm strut, and then the other, began to square off in the beginnings of plating. Small lumps began to round out at each end, slender digits sprouting one by one. The chassis began to streamline into curves, hourglassing up and out to form a chestplate and flaring out again below the waist. 

The balance of weight changed as it grew, and Prowl hastily adjusted his hands until he could support it from under the newly formed joint spaces where its arms joined its chassis. Leg struts were visible now, protomass almost waterfalling down with how fast it was moving. 

Impatient. Clearly this newspark took after their progenitor. 

“I’m just gonna– go,” Jazz said, backing rapidly away. “Get help. Ratchet. Optimus! That’ll– yeah.”

After spouting that bafflingly incoherent string of glyphs, he transformed with a fluid twist of whirring clicks before Prowl could get a word out in reply and screeched away. 

The mech was impossible. If Prowl were to indulge in metaphorical imagery, he would describe Jazz as purely composed of chaos, charisma and confusion that still inexplicably produced statistically improbable stellar results. Prime was lucky he didn’t have Jazz as a SIC or their main strategy of attack would probably revolve around _baffling_ the Decepticons into submission. Probably accompanied by a soundtrack composed entirely of audial-shattering Earth tunes.

Prowl looked back down at the protoform. They’d developed a helm now, and– was that _doorwings_? How unusual. Perhaps they were somehow pulling specs from Prowl’s configuration instead of their progenitor’s. Seeing as their progenitor had bolted off faster than Prowl had seen him run before with _Megatron_ on his heels, and abandoned his responsibilities to Prowl. Again. 

With a near inaudible _pop_ , first one optic and then a second sifted themselves out of the shifting mass that was the newspark’s forming faceplates. It’s quickly followed by a nasal ridge and the beginnings of lips. The newspark of course did not wait until their features were fully formed before they onlined their optics in weak flicker of blue light. As Prowl induced before – impatient. Perhaps with early intervention and attentive mentorship the worst of that particular trait could be mitigated, or at least redirected into positive outlets.

The last details of the newspark’s frame settled, nearly complete. They were still a dull protoform grey, and should remain that way for a least the next cycle while systems more crucial than surface nanites took priority in using the precious energy available

Were there still extra cubes of energon in his subspace? Prowl always kept at least some fuel on him, but it wasn’t always low grade – which if he remembered correctly was the only sort of fuel appropriate for a newbuild.

The newspark stared at him with their still booting optics. They worked their intake silentlyuntil they finally managed to produce a buzz of static. Their vocal protocols must not be booting up correctly. Perhaps Prowl could assist in triggering the right sequence?

He hummed at them again, stroking his digits gently over their thin plating as much as he could while still keeping them balanced and upright. They cocked their head, faceplates contorting like they hadn’t quite figured out which sorts of movements went together to make interpretable expressions. After a moment they activated their vocalizer again and hummed back at him – the same tone, albeit in a slightly higher tenor.

Good. If they were able to hear, process, and repeat vocalizations that was a promising sign nothing had gone wrong in the initial coding. He slowly lessened his grip, letting them take more of their own weight until their gyros finished calibration and they stood entirely on their own.  Satisfied, Prowl released his hands and dropped them to his side. 

The newspark didn’t like that. They didn't like that at _all_ and protested by lurching forward and repeating the humming sound over and over in a manner that sounded almost frantic. What were they...? 

Oh. Clearly they still required the reassurance of another mech's touch. 

He caught them when they tangled their own feet in their incoordination, and didn’t let go this time when they regained their stability. They hummed at Prowl again, vocalization coming out slightly calmer now they had gotten what they wanted. 

Where were the other Autobots? Jazz had _seemed_ to imply he was leaving Prowl with his unexpected progeny to fetch them and someone should have been here by now. Fine. Prowl would bring the newspark to Medical himself. After he taught them how to properly access their motor routines. And perhaps respond to queries.

“Hello,” Prowl said, modulating his vocalizer to a more soothing and emotional inflection-laden setting. Newsparks and forged mecha statistically tended to prefer that sort of thing.

The newspark stared up at him with big, wide optics. 

“Hello!” they chirped. “Hello hello hello!”

**Author's Note:**

> kudos and comments are <3 and fuel


End file.
